Hopefully, Manic Monday will soon become a thing of the past!  I'll have to come up with a new tag for Monday posts then.

Today, I had to get up early so I could get my yearly blood work done.  (These have to be fasting so it's best if they are done first thing -- no temptation to eat.)  I left Jeff in bed, after informing him the oldest was awake.  As I was walking out the door the youngest asks me where I'm going with my purse, so I told him.  I then suggested he let his Daddy know he was up.

I got home about a half hour later (just about the time Jeff needed to rush out the door for an in-service meeting at work).  The boys were just then sitting down to breakfast.  Once breakfast was over off to the Rail to Trail to walk (1.25 miles).  The boys did great!  We got home and they decided it was time for lunch.  It's so great, they are all old enough now to manage a simple sandwich prep.  However, today, Zachary and Nick decided they wanted pizza.  Nick graciously heated Zachary's pizza for him and then got it out of the microwave!  Mitchell ate his new favorite lunch (2 slice bologna sandwich). 

I began inputting chore assignments in to a program I'm trying (free for 15 days!) called My Reward Board.  Basically it works as a tracking device for doing chores and obtaining goals.  It also has a reward point system.  The program also tracks the child's allowance (if you do that sort of thing).  Well, one thing it also does is allow the parents to issue demerits (and withhold allowance if they get a certain amount).  The boys discussed it and decided that they would be allowed 3 demerits then they would lose their weekly allowance.  All 3 boys indicated that at school they only get 3 strikes before they lose their reward (or go to 'Red Light').

We implemented many of the 'chores' today and this evening ran very smoothly.  Hopefully tomorrow will be even better.

I've got some pictures from Special Olympics (Saturday, June 7) that I'll try to get posted sometime this week.  Nick did really well as did the other Marion County golfer.

Name one thing you would change about your wedding and why.  There is a restriction though.  You can't change the groom.

 

First off I wouldn't want to change the groom.  I love the groom!

Hmm, what would I change? 

I think one change I would make would be to make sure the photographer knew exactly what pictures I wanted.  (We are missing several I would have liked to have had and a few that we got weren't that great.  Like the one of Jeff and I cutting the cake, the photographer took one picture and my stepdaughter happened to walk in front of the camera at that moment.  (Oh, and I'd have made sure my Dad didn't change my son immediately following the ceremony so I could have more pictures of him in a tux.)

The only other thing I think I'd change is I'd ask for more help with getting the children (stepdaughter and son) ready that morning.  It got a little hectic that day, my stepdaughter disappeared with her dad and brother (I had her dress and stuff to do her hair) before she was ready.  My Mom and SIL disappeared.  I had to get my son ready.  I asked my Dad if he was driving me to the church and got snapped at.  I ended up breaking down and crying at that point.  My SIL saw me and said, "Finally, you're acting like a real bride!"  I guess being calm and happy on your wedding day isn't what a 'real bride' does.  So, the main thing I'd want to change is that part of the day (and that isn't even the ceremony part). 

After days (and days) of seemingly unending rain, we finally had a decent day and we were able to accomplish much work.

With the boys in school, Jeff and I managed to get the gate fixed much to the dogs dismay.  (I do believe Boots is thankful to be off the chain but both seemed quite perturbed that their escape route had been altered and is no longer usable {they had been going through, please pray neither decides to start jumping it}.)

After we finished the gate, we moved on to the deck.  Once Nick got home Jeff enlisted his help while I went after the two younger boys.  Once I got them home, all hands were put to deck building with the quote, "If you want to eat, then you better work!"

By six o'clock we had the deck complete, the chairs, tables and grill moved on to it.  We then ventured inside for showers and dinner (hot dogs, homemade french fries, and baked beans) and movie night.  The boys are tucked in and Jeff is relaxing by watching a ball game while I update the blog.

I can't wait to enjoy my new deck this summer.  Hopefully, we get the front deck finished soon as well.  (Our initial plan was to enlarge it, but with the nice new {huge} back deck, I think we'll just finish it off.)  We still need to stain and seal both decks, but for now they'll do.

Our day started off with Baseball (first game of the season).  We had a blustery day but thankfully the sun was shining and all had a good time.

Zachary on 1st base, Nick in right field.

Mitchell running up to assist Tanner.

Once home from the game we quickly moved to the project at hand -- Deck Building and laying the decking.  (Sorry no in progress shots today, but the pictures will let you see how much we got done between 3:30p and 5:00p.)

We plan to start the second half on Monday, say a little prayer we have sunshine again.  We also plan on getting some chain link so we can repair the gate and hopefully that will keep the dogs inside the yard.   (I ended up having to chain Boots to a tree today in order to keep them inside the fence.  Max doesn't leave unless Boots does.)

Today we (Jeff mainly) finished nailing up the stringers and started screwing in the decking.  We couldn't start working on it until the afternoon thanks again to the rain and had to stop early due to Soccer and Jeff working.

Here's the pictures I got today.

Zachary and Nick attempting to hand screw the screws into the decking.  (Nick kept complaining it was too hard, but it kept him busy!)  Mitchell is holding the bucket of screws and handing them to Jeff who is using the electric drill to install them.

Eleven decking boards got installed before we had to quit for the night. 

Thanks to the hard work of the boys the lumber was stacked neatly in the backyard.  Now for Day Two of our adventure.  Here's a before shot of the back door area of the house.

Installing the beam that attaches to the house.  I helped get one end up and then had Jeff hold the other end up so I could get a picture of the "work in progress."

Hard at work while wife takes pictures.

24' installed!  Alright! (Please ignore the mud on the house, Max (our Golden Retriever likes to jump up and let us know when he wants in).

Sawing the posts.

Digging the post holes.

Once the boys got home they started helping me put the stringers in place.  (Decking is just sitting on the stringers so we can get in and out of the back door.)  We worked from 10:30a until about 5:00pm (it started raining).  I think Jeff and I are still sore from our adventure.  I've got a few bruises (Nick pulled a drop and pull a few times dropping stringers onto my feet).  Zachary got a few bruises too thanks to me dropping a board which I thought I had high enough up that it would miss the one he was holding but didn't, poor baby.  He survived and forgave me.

In May 2000 we moved into our home bringing with us our newborn (well he was born in February and came home in March) son, our 6 almost 7 year old son.  Jeff and I added a partial front deck (the idea was always to expand it; however, we never got around to or had the finances when other things weren't of higher priority), paver sidewalks and cinder block steps for the back.  Over the years we have added a building to store the lawn equipment, Christmas items, bikes, etc. and a couple of flower beds.  To the backyard we've had it fenced (to keep the boys and now the two dogs hopefully confined), and added a swing set, a playhouse, a garden and a basket ball hoop.

This year we are (thanks to the stimulus package) adding a deck!  Our deck will be 24' x 12' (so we'll probably just finish off the front deck leaving it 8' x 10').

To start with we made a trip to Home Depot and to Lowe's to price the deck supplies.  Turned out we could get what we needed and get it delivered for a lot less going with Home Depot, so they got our business.

Tuesday, May 13, the lumber was delivered.  Thankfully, it wasn't raining.  Unfortunately, it had rained on Monday and Jeff wasn't able to get the yard mowed as planned so building would have to wait until the yard was mowed (with all the rain we've had, Jeff has to mow when he's off and the sun is shining).

Once the yard was mowed it was time to start our deck, but first the lumber needed moved to the backyard (inside the fence).  I was off gathering needed household supplies at our local Walmart  (isn't that where all good wives get their household supplies?).  Jeff knew he couldn't get the lumber over the fence (long story, short version -- gate is currently unusable so anything going in or out of the backyard goes over the fence or through the house) and where it needed to be alone.  What's a man to do?  He thinks and decides, why not use the labor God provided!  Boys!  Let's get this lumber moved.  Jeff hands it over the fence the boys working together move it to the designated location.  Now according to Jeff there was much moaning and groaning over this task.   I can't say positively as once I got home and pulled out the camera (as the following pictures will show) the boys cheerfully hauled lumber.

Now before anyone complains to the labor board about violations of child labor laws, here's a few that show that Jeff helped move the lumber too!

My hard workers!

The following says it so much better than I can.  A little over 14 years ago in 1993, I became a mother for the very first time.  I repeated that miraculous event again in 2000 and yet again, in 2002.

Each time I would say I just want a healthy baby.  Truth is, like this article says, Mothers lie, we really want the perfect baby and when you don't get that perfection, that dream, sometimes you do go through a period of sadness, of why me?  But then you stop and you see, you got a wonderful gift in the baby you did get. 

We might not always agree that God made the right choice when he gave us the baby we received, but, like my Dad once told me, God sees the big picture and we can rest confident in the plan He has chosen for us.

God even tells us, in His word, "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."  Jeremiah 29:11 (NIV)

I hope you enjoy the following Mother's Day essay.

Happy Mother's Day
By Lori Borgman

Expectant mothers waiting for a newborn's arrival say they don't care what sex the baby is. They just want to have ten fingers and ten toes.

Mothers lie.

Every mother wants so much more. She wants a perfectly healthy baby with a round head, rosebud lips, button nose, beautiful eyes and satin skin. She wants a baby so gorgeous that people will pity the Gerber baby for being flat-out ugly.

She wants a baby that will roll over, sit up and take those first steps right on schedule. Every mother wants a baby that can see, hear, run, jump and fire neurons by the billions. She wants a kid that can smack the ball out of the park and do toe points that are the envy of the entire ballet class. Call it greed if you want, but a mother wants what a mother wants. Some mothers get babies with something more.

Maybe you're one who got a baby with a condition you couldn't pronounce, a spine that didn't fuse, a missing chromosome or a palate that didn't close. The doctor's words took your breath away. It was just like the time at recess in the fourth grade when you didn't see the kick ball coming, and it knocked the wind right out of you.

Some of you left the hospital with a healthy bundle, then, months, even years later, took him in for a routine visit, or scheduled him for a checkup, and crashed head first into a brick wall as you bore the brunt of devastating news. It didn't seem possible. That didn't run in your family. Could this really be happening in your lifetime?

There's no such thing as a perfect body. Everybody will bear something at some time or another. Maybe the affliction will be apparent to curious eyes, or maybe it will be unseen, quietly treated with trips to the doctor, therapy or surgery. Mothers of children with disabilities live the limitations with them.
Frankly, I don't know how you do it. Sometimes you mothers scare me.

How you lift that kid in and out of the wheelchair twenty times a day. How you monitor tests, track medications, and serve as the gatekeeper to a hundred specialists yammering in your ear.
I wonder how you endure the clichés and the platitudes, the well-intentioned souls explaining how God is at work when you've occasionally questioned if God is on strike. I even wonder how you endure schmaltzy columns like this one-saluting you, painting you as hero and saint, when you know you're ordinary.

You snap, you bark, you bite. You didn't volunteer for this, you didn't jump up and down in the motherhood line yelling, "Choose me, God. Choose me! I've got what it takes."

You're a woman who doesn't have time to step back and put things in perspective, so let me do it for you. From where I sit, you're way ahead of the pack. You've developed the strength of the draft horse while holding onto the delicacy of a daffodil. You have a heart that melts like chocolate in a glove box in July, counter-balanced against the stubbornness of an Ozark mule. You are the mother, advocate and protector of a child with a disability.
You're a neighbor, a friend, a woman I pass at church and my sister-in-law. You're a wonder.

Lori Borgman is a syndicated columnist and author of All Stressed Up and No Place To Go, her latest humor book now available wherever books are sold.

What scripture is really ministering to your heart right now, and why?

I've thought about this since the suggestion was made to blog about this topic.  Today I received a Proverbs 31 Ministry Devotion email that spoke volumes to me.   The scripture verse referenced in devotional was:

"Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her."

Proverbs 31:28 (NIV)

I think one reason it spoke so much to me is we (my husband and I) are dealing with some issues revolving (we thought) around our oldest son.  These issues led us to reach out for help from a Positive Behavioral Support Team. 

In the course of our dealings thus far, I think we are both coming to the conclusion that the problem isn't just with our oldest son.  (Isn't that the way it really is in life?  Just when you think you know what causes all your grief and heartache you discover it really is you not the other guy?)  Anyhow, one problem has popped up, I don't have the confidence I need in my mothering to be a good great mother to my sons.    My sons sense this and have been attempting to take over (at least when I'm in charge) more and more. 

I want so much to be this mother and wife that I seriously ache thinking I can't do it.  (Which leads me to something I've been telling my boys for years...."There is no such thing as "can't"; either you don't know how or you won't.  If you don't know how, you can learn.  If you won't, just admit it and save us all a good bit of time."  In theory I know how; in practice however, I don't know how and need to learn and I do believe I am learning.

I'm currently keeping ABC charts on Nick's inappropriate behaviors.  (I may do the same for the little ones.)  Starting this week, I'm making a conscientious effort to notice when they do good.  I'm making a conscientious effort to smile more (especially at my boys).  My goal is to raise mature, responsible, caring and emphatic adult men.  To do that I need to train them in acceptable behaviors and ways to communicate their needs, wants and desires while training them to accept that our world isn't always fair and sometimes even the good guys get hurt.

If you think about it, say a little prayer for us.  This adventure is priceless and I won't be able to take it back if I mess up so hopefully, Lord willing I will succeed in my endeavor.

Where is your cell phone?  On the base recharging.

Your significant other?  My husband, my lover, my best friend, my protector and my confidant.  I wonder how I managed so long without him in my life.

Your hair?  Strawberry to light auburn, just past shoulder length, slightly curly.

Your mother?  My Dad always said she was a SAHM that was never home, between volunteer work (that involved the children) to her golfing and everything in between.

Your father?  My Hero.

Your favorite thing? Alone time with my husband.

Your dream last night?  Sorry, don't remember it, but what I do remember it was strange.

Your favorite drink?  Ice tea.

Your dream/goal?  I'm living it.

The room you are in? Living Room.

Your fear?  Losing my loved ones and being alone.

Where do you want to be in 6 years?  Haven't thought about it.

Where were you last night?  Took the boys to soccer then came home and watched CSI & Without a Trace.

What you are not?  A man.

Muffins? Yes, please.  Blueberry or Banana Nut preferably.

One of your wish list items?  A little girl of my own.

Where you grew up?  North Carolina and West Virginia

The last thing you did?  Read a message board I frequent.

What are you wearing?  Jeans & pajama top.

Your TV?  Jeff is watching DVR'd Criminal Minds supposedly, I think he is asleep though (worked last night) as I hear snoring.  Me, I'm in the other room.

Your computer?  HP Desktop, other one is a Dell Desktop.

Your life? Very busy, very full, and slightly stressful.

Your mood? Tired and cranky (I think I'll get Jeff and go climb back into bed for a few hours).

Missing someone?  Not at the moment.

Your car?  Toyota Camry (Thanks Grandma!)

Something you are not wearing?  an unmentionable

Favorite store?  A bookstore -- I love to read.

Your summer?   No plans.

Your favorite color? Blues.

When is the last time you laughed?  This morning, even when the boys drive me nuts they can still make me laugh.

Last time you cried?   Wanted to last night, but managed not to, need to figure out how to get more control over Nick.

Who will repost this? YOU! I tag YOU! If you play along, let me know in the comments, and I'll come visit you. (I like the way she worded that!)

What room in your house would you give a "makeover" and why?

Hmm, Ideally, I'd love to redo the entire house; however, if I have to limit it to one room, then I guess I better start with my oldest son's room.

Why?  Well, let's just say Nick developed a bad habit and that habit has caused the rug to be ruined in his room as well as one wall.  Plus a few years ago our hot water tank sprang a leak and part of the sub-flooring was ruined.

I already have in mind what I would do, too.  First off, I'd love hardwood floors through out the house so as long as we are replacing the carpet, I'd get hardwood.  His walls would be painted WVU Blue and Gold since that is one of his favorite teams.  My Mom is making him a quilt (based on a design I came up with that utilizes a Team Banner).  On one wall, I'd put one of those Big Head Helmets and on the other walls I want to put up photos and sport motive decals.  I also want to put up shelves and display cabinets for his Special Olympic medals and Miracle League Baseball trophies. 

“What do you want?” « For Sinners Only

A friend suggested we check out the above blog.  It's really thought provoking.  "What do I really want?"  Do I want Jesus to put me up on a stage and say, "Look here's a wonderful example?"  Or do I really want Jesus to heal all the brokenness within me?  I think for me, I'd really rather he heal me than hold me up as an example.  Yes, like most people I enjoy an "good job" pat on the back, but I really don't like being center stage where all can see.  Perhaps it's because I am too aware of my flaws (to the point that I often refuse to believe those "good job" pats).

I think what the author of this blog also points out, at least to me, is too often we are so busy showing off our self-righteousness that we lose sight of the real meaning of being a Christian.  Am I really a follower of Christ (i.e., to I put into motion what He preached), or am I just a little too self-serving?

I have an image of judgement day, where I'm standing before God, with Jesus acting as my defender, and Satan acting as the prosecutor.  Every time Satan points out a place in my life where I broke one of God's commandments with tears running down my face, I confess, "Yes, I did that."  Jesus is telling me that he is my defender and to let him defend me.  I repeatedly look at him and say, "But I did those things, shouldn't I pay the price?"  Jesus finally says, "Father (or Your Honor), I request that the court accept that I paid the price for my client's sin.  I did this freely of my own choosing so that she may live."  Then God turns to me and asks, "Child, did you accept My Son as your Savior?  Did you confess with your mouth that He died to pay for the sins you committed?"  Tearfully, I respond, "Yes, but I see now I wasn't worthy of that cost.  How can You love me after what I cost You?"  God looks down and smiles before He answers (it's one of the sad type smiles you get when you want to reassure your child even though you are hurting), "I love you because you were made in Our image and are deemed worthy."  At this point in the dream, I either wake up or I hear the song, "Thank You."  I think that song says so much, because often we affect others in ways we never know in this lifetime.  I think back to when I was in high school and a boy I liked told me he could no longer see me.  When I pushed for a reason, he explained he had been seeing someone else and had gotten them pregnant.  He told me that until he had gotten to know me he would have walked away from that girl and never looked back, because of knowing me, he knew that wasn't the answer.  He told me I made a difference in his life and he knew he had to do the right thing for both the girl and his child.

Perhaps, I'll never bring millions to Christ, but I believe if I can make a difference in just one person's life and bring them to Christ then just maybe my purpose for being was served.

So, if Jesus asked you today what would you say you wanted?

The phone rings and you are informed that you have won an all expense paid trip for one week.  Where are you going?  What will you do there?  Who, if anyone, are you taking with you?  Is there anything special you are bringing?  Feel free to write anything else relating to this trip or you could even write it from a character's perspective.  Let the imagination flow!

Hmm, I think I'd like to take my family (parents, MIL, children, grandmother) and go to Hawaii (but not the typical touristy part).  My Grandma, Mom and Dad all lived there at one time and I have a cousin and several second cousins living there now.

One reason I'd like to go there is I enjoy the beach (since Hawaii is a group of islands there are naturally plenty of beaches to visit).   I also think it would be wonderful to see the islands through my grandmother and parents' eyes.  You know, this is what has changed type stuff.

I'm not sure I could convince Jeff to go though (he's not too keen on the idea of flying).  So, my second choice would be a cruise around the Caribbean (if I can find someone to help keep a short leash on Nick).

So, where would you go?

Well, this afternoon it was beautiful outside, a lovely 75 degrees outside so the boys were out in our fenced in backyard.  This is the fence we had installed shortly after we moved in with the hopes that it would keep Nick confined to the backyard.  It also helped to keep the dog inside the backyard too! 

Well, as they say, the best laid plan of mice and men....Let's just say the fence is no longer doing it's part of the plan.  The golden retriever taught the Australian shepherd how to jump over the gate before he disappeared.  (He's back now and surprisingly doesn't even attempt to jump the fence any longer; unfortunately, the shepherd still jumps it when she can't figure out a way out without jumping.)  And now, to top things off, Nick has discovered he can climb over the fence!

I jokingly told my Mom that I feel like I'm running a prison camp.  I have two guard dogs (though I think they need a refresher course on their job duties), a guard {Zack}, Jeff is the warden and I'm the assistant warden.  I haven't quite figured out if Mitchell is an inmate or a guard, guess summer will tell on that account, but Nick is definitely a "guest" in our fine little camp. 

So, the story of today's adventure.....

Boys are out back playing, I'm blissfully reading a book thinking all is well in our little camp while the warden sleeps.  We are unaware a jail break is about to ensue.  My peace is interrupted when I hear the dogs barking.  No biggie, they bark all the time (hence the needing to be retrained comment) so I don't get too alarmed.  Minutes later in runs my little guard announcing, "Nick's gone over the fence!"  I pop up run out the front door (after sending the guard to the exercise yard to watch over the others) and find Nick attempting his escape through the woods, fortunately for me, unfortunately for him,  the briars are starting to make their comeback after the long winter (who needs barbed wire? just joking) and they impede his escape plans.  I catch him and he looks at me and says, "I heard a noise."  (Farmer is back out on his tractor and Nick can't resist the lure of the tractor's call.)  I escort him back to the exercise yard and tell the guards to stay alert.

I think it's going to be a long summer.

This week's assignment is taken from the book No One Cares What You Had for Lunch.

You can live your whole life following the path of least resistance. No risks, no unknowns, no discomfort. And goodness knows that we all dream of a tombstone that reads, "I was comfortable."

So our assignment this week was to tell about the biggest risk you could take in your life right now. It doesn't have to be cliff-diving dramatic. Perhaps it would be easier to jump out of a plane than to go after your dream job. Or maybe something that seems simple to other people is terrifying to you.

What would you risk if you had the nerve?

Hmm, what would I risk if I had the nerve?  There is a part of me that has yearned to go to law school, but fear of failure and cost associated with law school have definitely kept me from pursuing it.  Why law school?  Well, I have this desire to be an advocate for children.  I think all too often our system has forgotten the child that is in the center of their legal battles.  All too often, the letter of the law weighs more than the spirit of the law.  All too often either the state's (government's) desires or rights (as they interpret the law) and even the parent's desires or rights (as they see them) over ride what is truly in the child's best interest.

Take the cases in Texas involving the polygamy group.  The children involved have led very sheltered lives.  Based on one phone (factual or not) the state (CPS) swooped in and took the children from the only homes they've ever known.  The state is wanting to place these children in foster care while they sort out the situation (the 16 who placed the call that started the ball rolling according to reports hasn't been located).  Will the state take the time to find foster homes that are similar in nature to what the children are used to living?  (By that I mean, very sheltered, conservative God fearing homes?)  Or will they just place them where ever they can find a bed available?  Talk about culture shock!  The state is arguing they can't return the children home because the mothers knew about the abuse.  My question is can a mother who was raised in that type of lifestyle truly understand the state's contention that forcing a 12 or 13 year old girl to marry a 40 year old (or older) man is abuse?  Especially when that is all they have ever known? 

It's cases like that, that make me yearn to have the legal knowledge and background to plead for the child.  Those children want and desire to return home (in most cases).  The teens may or may not especially now that they have been exposed to another culture. 

Other cases that cause my yearning to strike are the ones where the states give children back to parents that are unfit in the name of giving the parent another chance.  How many chances does the parent get before the child's best interest overrides the parent's right to try again?

Still other cases that bother me are the ones where the parents are divorcing and no one bothers to stand up for the child and say, "This child needs both parents."  Too often, one parent is regulated to a non-custodial status and the custodial parent makes it increasingly harder for the other parent to see or be a part of the child's life.  We have family judges who, whether they admit it or not, subscribe to the "Golden Uterus" philosophy (which is the woman who gives birth can do no wrong).  We have school systems that assume anytime the non-custodial parent tries to inquire or, heaven forbid, question anything the custodial parent is or isn't doing it is only to cause problems for the custodial parent not because the non-custodial parent is striving to do what is best for his/her child.

oops, looks like I've gone off on a tangent.  So, I'll stop there and just say that what I would love to do if I had the nerve and money wasn't an issue is to go to law school.

In closing I want to add something I received in the mail yesterday.

Our Deepest Fear 
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.
Your playing small doesn't serve the world.
There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you.
We are all meant to shine, as children do.
We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.
It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone.
And as we let our light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.
Marianne Williamson, international author and lecturer

What do you think?  Is the author right?  Do we really fear success more than failure?

Fish In My Hair: Be Careful For What Thou Wisheth (a true story)

You have got to read this lady's Blog post!  I don't know whether to laugh with her at the descriptive writing style or cry with her over her loss. 

I've got a friend who shares part of the same philosophy I do about wishes and God's sense of humor.  I think often times we find ourselves making wishes or requests only to be shocked, amazed or disappointed at how the wish or request is fulfilled.

Growing up I often said all I wanted to be was a mother and a wife.  (I know I've got that backwards but that was how I typically answered the "What do you want to be when you grow up question?"  First response was "A Mommy."  Then when pushed I'd agree that yes I wanted to be a wife too.  I think in my childhood naivety I just figured all Mommies were wives and it was a big DUH! to think otherwise.  Little did I know!)  Well as I got older I amended my "What do I want to be.." to simply say, "I want to be a mom by the time I'm 30."  (Remember the childhood naivety about being a wife before being a mom.  I should have known better and amended my statement to "I want to be married and have a child before I'm 30."  I didn't and God gave me what I asked for --  Motherhood before I was 30.  Actually I gave birth 5 months before my 30th birthday.  See, God does answer prayers.  I did go on to become a wife (about 6 years later).  Looking back, I realize that no, the order I proceeded wasn't exactly as it should have been, but it served a purpose.  I had almost 6 years to devote to my oldest son (the one that just happens to have Down Syndrome).  He had his Mommy completely to himself those early years.  I wasn't torn between doing what was best for my child or someone else. 

Have you had a prayer or a wish granted, just not the way you expected?  Looking back did things work out?

Are you willing to trust Romans 8:28? 

And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.

I challenge you to trust that verse this weekend and next week.  See if life is a little easier knowing that things will work for the glory of God if you just trust Him.

Do you Blog like you talk?

I wasn't quite sure how to answer this question, so I asked a friend.  Her response?  Nah!  You don't type as much as you talk.

So volume wise I guess the answer is no.  Style wise?  I'd say it's similar but not completely the same.  I tend to use my hands a lot when talking (the Italian in me perhaps).  I tend to use my hands when I type but that's simply because I haven't figured out another way to type.

I do tend to ramble at times when I talk, since I'm just starting my blogging I'm not sure how much I'm going to ramble.  Oops, looks like I'm rambling now.

So, do you blog like you talk? 

Funny I posted about de-stressing yesterday, looks like I really need that tonight.  Didn't get my evening walk on the Rail to Trail but did get a hike this afternoon.

Remember Nick?  My 14 year old with a little something extra?  Well, he tends to wander but had been doing better so we'd given him the job of fetching the garbage can from the road and bringing it up to the house on garbage day.  Today is garbage day.  He gets home from school and I remind him he has a job.  "Oh, right!"  Off he goes to perform said job, or so I think.  I give him about 10 minutes before I start worrying (I know he likes to chat to his invisible friend Logan and sometimes 'forgets' to go straight down and straight back).  Since I heard the dogs barking and yipping I figured he was out by the fence.  So I pop my head out the door.  The garbage can is still at the foot of the driveway.  Hmmm......where's Nick?  I pop out the door and look around (between the house & the building, near the fence)...No Nick!  Pop on around, check the tracker (Jeff sometimes has Pepsi in the tracker and Nick loves pop).  No Nick!  I run back into the house, tell Jeff Nick has vanished. 

Jeff is leaving to go pick up the younger two boys and says he'll check down the road for me to stay at the house and yell for Nick.  I do, No Nick and no answer to my yells.

Jeff gets back, I've doubled checked inside -- No Nick.  Jeff didn't see Nick.  Youngest calls for Nick, we hear a faint answer.  I take off through the woods (direction the answer came from yelling -- no response).  Jeff locks in the hubs and takes the tracker up the dirt road (4-wheelers have created) and sends me back to the house with the younger boys.

Beyond the woods is a field and as luck would have it a farmer is working the field with his tractor (this is what caught Nick's attention and drew him away from his 'job').  Jeff gets the tracker up as far as he can (has to park it due to some trees he can't get through or go around) and gets out and walks.  Farmer asks, "You looking for a little boy about yeah high, kinda autistic?"  Jeff answers "Yep!"  Farmer points Nick out almost to a road and offers Jeff a ride on his tractor, which Jeff accepts.  By the time Jeff gets to the road, Nick has hightailed it to a farm house (after visiting with horses and cows and ripping the seat out of his pants on a fence) and is hiding under their table crying, "I'm sorry, I'm scared, I'm hungry."  Farmer comments to Jeff -- boy was real polite, said his name was Nick and where he was from then asked for a drink.

By car he ended up about 4 miles (round trip) from the house.  Not sure how many acres he traveled in 45 minutes since he went crossed country.

It amazes me how a boy who can move so slow and complain at times about walking on a paved trail can move so fast and not complain when he takes off cross-country.

Well, I'm off to de-stress -- Long soak in the tub and I think I need to wash the new grays out of my hair.

Before I sign off I thought I'd show you how peaceful and angelic he can look after the scare he gave his mother!

Life -- It's an Adventure!

Sunday evening we all decided to hit the Rail to Trails out at the local state park.  It was wonderful to get back out there and walk, even with my bronchial spasms!  We ended up walking 1.25 miles round trip.  I know it's not much, but when you consider the 6, 8 & 14 year olds ran and walked it without complaint it's pretty good.  (The 44 and the 50 year old woke up a little sore this morning.)

At any rate, Jeff and I decided to hit the trail again this morning, we're able to maintain a faster pace alone.   Yes, I realize the boys run ahead but they also slow down and walk and play along the way so mine and Jeff's pace is a little slower than if we're alone.  It was so nice just walking and talking with my sweetheart.  For the most part we were alone on the trail too.

This afternoon, since Jeff had to work tonight (and he's on his feet all night), the boys and I took off for the trail and Jeff stayed home and fixed dinner.  I love watching their excitement as we head down the trail.  Since they'd put in a full day at school, Nick did start complaining before we turned back.  (He hates to sweat and tends to get heat rash very easily.)  But he persevered and we made it the 1.25 miles!

Our goal is to walk it everyday, hopefully I (with Jeff or alone) will manage to get in two walks a day.  Walking was always a great de-stressor for me and I often would bring a book and disappear into the woods for hours at a time.  Since having children I've missed that, the Rail to Trail offers a little bit of the walking in the woods feel while still having a clearly defined path to keep the boys on while we walk.

ooh, since mentioning de-stressors I think I'll list my top 5.  If you decide to blog on your top 5 de-stressors drop me a line and I'll check them out!

How do You De-stress?

1. Long walks
2. Long baths
3. Long showers
4. Snuggle time with my husband
5. Hugs from my boys

Or Life with Nick -- It's an Adventure!

First let me show you my handsome young men after church on Easter Sunday:

As you can see, they all look very nice.

Today for church the boys decided to wear these same outfits.  No problem.  They get dressed and off to church we go.  The boys each attend their age appropriate classes and Jeff and I go off to the sanctuary for our worship time.  Jeff and I are thinking things went smoothly today even after Nick balked because he saw some classmates in the gym playing ball and wanted to join them (we wouldn't let him).

We go upstairs to retrieve the boys after the service.  Jeff goes after the younger two and I go after Nick.  Nick is sitting in the hallway on the lap of a female helper sobbing and the male teacher is looking on.  I get closer and discover my oldest son is covered in paint!  (Black and orange paint to be exact.)

Trust me it looks a lot worse close up!

Seems about the last 10 minutes of class, Nick got bored? Distracted? Who knows and he sure wasn't telling!  Anyhow, he got up and wandered into the adjoining room.  The helpers didn't think too much of it as he has often done that and either laid on the couch or played the fooseball game.  Today for some reason he opened up the supply cabinet and got into the paint.  (Once home Nick informs me he wanted to paint a picture of me, my long hair, etc.)  For some reason he tried drinking the paint too, thankfully it was non-toxic and he didn't like the taste but he did scare a few people.  At any rate, not only did he get his clothes but he got windows and the rug in the classroom.  Thankfully it all cleaned (or so I've been informed) and no one seemed mad at him (or me for not training him better).  I will say this in my defense on the 'not training him better' this was totally unexpected as Nick typically has a tactile aversion to getting paint on his hands and/or clothes.  Up until this year he typically did whatever he could to avoid doing any painting in art class.

I decided to blog about this because I'm sure (after talking to one of the helpers "L") that one day we'll probably laugh about it -- not sure when that day will come.  Anyhow, "L" is a nurse and she was extremely worried since Nick got some of the paint into his mouth so she took it upon herself to call not only Poison Control, but our local university hospital, several ER doctors she knew personally and Duke to verify that the paint wouldn't hurt Nick.  The staff at church was extremely compassionate and wanted to know how they could help him.  To be honest, I'm not sure.  Hopefully we get some answers soon as I've contacted a Behavioral Clinic to help us with these types of behaviors.